Skin Deep
by KneesandWings13
Summary: Everyone has a struggle to just look in the mirror at times and like what they see. I wrote this because no matter where you are in life, our how you feel about yourself, there is always that one person who loves and accepts you just the way you are, even at your lowest points. (For my sister, the Angel of my heart and constant inspiration)
1. Chapter 1

~o~

I looked in the refrigerator again, and then immediately closed it. My stomach made complaining noises, but I wasn't going to ruin the workout I had just done by giving in this time. I drank more and more water, and ignored my cravings. Why I had I even bought the damn pizza and ice cream in the first place I'll never know.

I showered and decided to just get some sleep, I promised myself I would eat a healthy breakfast in the morning, and not the donuts I had given in and bought yesterday. I didn't want to look any worse than I already felt, and I had a date this Friday.

I made my way through breakfast, egg whites and toast like a good girl. I grabbed my water bottle and headed to the gym, a nice workout would help my mood I hoped. It was Wednesday, and maybe by Friday I could convince my body to look good enough for my date. I tried not to think about how good looking my date was, I mean we had worked together for a couple months now, I was his bosses secretary, so he passed by my desk on a regular basis.

Gabriel who always smiled at me, asked about my day, offered to bring me coffee or a snack on a regular basis. At first I thought he was just being polite, like so many others who had to come see the big boss. But his smile never left his face when we talked, and somehow I had gone from polite to flirting back with him. I figured it couldn't hurt, and it had been way to long since I had anyone really pay me compliments the way he did. And when he asked me out on Monday, I had immediately said yes, Mexican food was my absolute favorite.

I pulled into the gym and walked into my Zumba class, trying to ignore all the size 0 girls in their booty shorts with their perfect manicures and not a hair out of place. I stayed more towards the back, hoping no one paid attention to me. I wondered why they even came to this class, obviously they were here more for the hot instructor than to sweat. And sweat I did, I was a hot mess by the time I left class. I slowly made my way towards my car, looking forward to a shower and maybe just one slice of pizza. I reached for my door handle, just as I heard someone calling my name.

~o~

"Angela?" I turned around and wanted to die on the spot. Gabriel was less than 5 feet from me, getting out of his car. I tried to act normal, and not like I was a hot sweaty mess. "Hey Gabe." He smiled brightly and gestured towards the gym. "I didn't know you came here. Zumba?" He winked and grinned. I nodded. "Do I have that freshly killed look?" He laughed and shrugged. "Nothing wrong with getting all hot and sweaty for a good cause. Maybe next time we'll go together, I have been meaning to try out my two left feet." I managed a laugh. "Sure. But for now I have a date with my shower, I will see you later." He waggled his eyebrows at me. "I think you mean Friday?" I nodded and climbed in my car, watching him walk away, now that's a nice sight I thought.

Before my shower I made the mistake of looking in my full length mirror and nearly died at my reflection. Had I really talked to my future date looking like something a cat had coughed up? No, I thought, what man in their right mind would look at me like this and possibly interested? I came to the conclusion that Gabriel was just being overly nice at the gym and was sure to cancel our date. I managed a shower and headed straight for the freezer, plopping onto the couch and eating the ice cream right out of the container.

Before I could stop myself it was gone, and I had to fight the urge to stuff down some pizza on top of it. I went to bed feeling depressed and angry with myself. I didn't want to face tomorrow when I knew for sure he would cancel our date.

~o~

It was only 10am, but he hadn't come by my desk yet, and I was convinced I knew why. He probably realized that I was not the kind of woman he wanted to be seen with, after all I was just the chubby secretary, and I wasn't even one of the powerful people in our law firm. I chugged down some more coffee, and dug around in my bag for another donut. I sat it on the desk as I answered the phone, wishing I had just not brought the damn box with me.

"Thank you for calling Winchester and Sons legal, how may I direct your call?"

"Angela?"

"Speaking."

"Hey, it's Gabe." I felt a small twinge of panic and thought, great, he's going to cancel over the phone…

"Hey Gabe, what's up?" Please don't cancel our date I thought.

"So, I just got invited to a ski trip this weekend!" He sounded way too excited, and I wondered if he had just made it up to let me off easy.

"Oh?" it was all I could manage to say, since thanks for canceling you jerk might draw attention from the nearby cubicles.

"Yep! And I was really hoping you could come along with me? I know it's short notice, but I'd love to have you join."

I sort of froze for a moment, wondering what to say. I was so set on the fact he was canceling that I couldn't wrap my brain around the alternative.

"Angie? You still there?"

"Yes I am. And I would really like to go, but I…"

"Great!" he exclaimed as he cut me off. "I'll get you from your house tomorrow at 6. Make sure to pack your snow boots!"

He hung up before I could explain I had never been snow skiing, and didn't own any snow boots. Crap, I was going to have to go do some serious shopping. I spent the rest of the day obsessing on google, about what to buy and I tried not to cringe as I looked at the cost of everything.

Several maxed out credit cards later I sat at home and checked and double checked I had everything I could possibly need for a weekend ski trip. I prayed that I wouldn't make an ass of myself, and that maybe, just maybe I would survive the weekend and actually still have Gabriel be interested in me. But deep down, I doubted it.


	2. Chapter 2

~o~

It was 10 minutes to 6, and sat there staring at my bags. I was still trying to convince myself that this was a good idea, even if I felt I looked like a pink penguin in my new ski jacket. I tried to quell my fears when I heard a knock at my door. I opened it and man did he look good in his black ski jacket, like a much sexier penguin. He smiled cheerfully. "Ready to go Angie?" I grabbed my bag and forced a smile. "Yep!"

He took my bag and set it in the backseat next to his, I felt relieved that his bag looked as stuffed as mine did. I buckled and he gave me a wink before starting the car. "I'm really glad you are coming with me!" I couldn't stop myself from giggling, he sounded way too cute. "Me too." And I was, mostly. I just had to figure out how to tell him I had no idea how to ski, and that I was slightly terrified I would end up looking like a total fool.

We drove for a while, listening to the radio and chatting about work and not much else. I spotted his cd case on the floor next to my feet and grabbed it giving him a questioning look. He almost looked nervous for a second, then shrugged and smiled. I liked him even more as I saw the Lynyrd Skynyrd CD sitting next to one labeled 'Driving Mix'. I put the Driving Mix CD in and set the case back down. Watching him pretending he wasn't singing along with 'I get off' by Halestorm was adorable, so I started singing also, until he kept looking at me while singing the song. I suddenly felt the need to unzip my jacket because it was getting a bit hot in the car for me. When 'Bad Girlfriend' started playing next I giggled and we sang along with it. Yup, I unzipped my jacket as he sang and kept looking at me, and I started wondering if I would really survive this weekend.

I felt myself actually beginning to relax, and had mostly managed to convince myself this was a really good idea. Up until he turned towards me and asked "Have you ever been skiing?" I bit my lip and gave him a deer in the headlights look. "Uhm… not really?" He breathed a sigh of relief and I gave him a curious look. "I have never skied in my life. I'm glad I won't be making myself look like a total ass in front of someone who knows what they are doing." He gestured towards his bag. "I bought all that stuff last night." I started to laugh, and he looked slightly startled, like he wasn't sure why I was laughing at him. I grabbed his hand and finally regained my composure. "Gabriel" I huffed. "I did the same thing" he went from relieved to amuse and we kept giggling at each other.

~o~

We pulled up to the resort and I saw a group of people waving at us. We grabbed our bags and headed over towards them. Gabriel grabbed my hand and introduced us. "Angie, this is Brian and Bobbie Jo, Balthazar and Kevin, Michael and Stephanie." I tried to breathe and remember their names and smile with a so nice to meet you. Michael pointed towards a cabin. "I already got us a place, I figure we'll grab dinner and make it an early night so we can hit the slopes first thing." Everyone agreed and we made our way to the cabin.

"Since you are last you two get stuck with the room downstairs." Balthazar said with a wink. Gabriel laughed. "Oh, I see how it is, I'm sure we will be fine." Gabriel caught my hand and I realized the bedroom we went in had only one bed, and I was sure there was no other rooms available.

"Please don't be mad." He said, running his hands through his hair. "I… I sort of told them you were my girlfriend." He shuffled and looked at his feet, and dear lord he was adorable. "Gabe. Look at me." He looked up and had puppy eyes. "Oh seriously Gabriel you are killing me with those eyes. I am not mad at all, and I will be your girlfriend for the weekend." I giggled. "Okay sweetie pie?" His eyes widened then he laughed. "Sure thing sugar bear."

We unpacked our stuff and compared what we each had bought, laughing because we must have googled pretty much the same list. I sat my toothbrush on the counter next to his and stared at myself in the bathroom mirror. I tried not to give in to my usual fears of how round my face was and why couldn't my hair just do what I wanted it to for once. I was about to have dinner with his friends and pretend to be his girlfriend. Just breathe I told myself, it's only for three days, you can do this.

~o~

We walked into the main building and it was really breathtaking, vaulted ceilings and giant fireplaces, rustic yet expensive looking. I was seated between Gabriel and Bobbi Jo, and after chatting with her for a few moments I knew I liked her. She was down to earth and honest and made me feel welcome immediately.

After we got our menus she smiled and nudged me. "You know we all were sure Gabriel was going to die alone, it's nice to see he finally gave up the priesthood." They all started laughing and I felt a hot blush creep up my cheeks. I looked at Gabriel and he was staring a hole through his menu, a half smile playing on his lips. Michael took a drink of his water and winked at me. "I am just glad my brother didn't go run and hide when you asked him out the first time." Balthazar laughed. "Amen to that."

Gabriel smiled at me and slid his arm around my shoulder. "What can I say, I have excellent taste." I was looking into those honeyed eyes and honestly couldn't speak for a moment, so I settled for grinning like an idiot at him. Bobbi Jo laughed. "You two are almost nauseatingly adorable. Get a room already!" More laughter from around the table and I could still feel my cheeks burning.

"So what looks good sugar bear?" Gabriel asked as his fingers twirled my hair. I forgot how to English for a moment when I looked into his eyes. "Food?" He chuckled softly and I totally forgot we were at a table full of people when he leaned closer, that beautiful smile tugging at his lips. "You know I love a woman with a big appetite for… food." Sweet lord have mercy, I am sure I stopped breathing. I heard Bobbi Jo making kissy noises next to me and everyone else started in on it also. Then Balthazar huffed and practically shouted "Just kiss the woman already so we can get to ordering!" And. He. Did.

By the time we came up for air I am sure my heart and everything else in my body had gone into overdrive. He smiled and winked. "How about I order for us both?" I managed to nod and eventually got myself under some semblance of control. Dinner was a blur of conversation and me trying to not think about his amazing mouth on mine.

~o~

I was pretty much still floating on cloud 9 as we walked back towards the cabin, my hand in his. It wasn't until we got to our room that I remembered we were going to be sharing a bed. Like together, in a bed. I nervously chewed my lip and tried to remember if I had packed any pajamas. He let go of my hand and smiled, still so close to me. "Angie, are you sure this is okay?" His voice was barely above a whisper. I took a breath. "I think I remembered to pack pajamas so we should be good." He gestured towards the bathroom. "Ladies first." I grabbed my bag and headed in.

I thankfully had packed some loose flannel pajamas, and quickly changed, brushed my teeth and hair. I came out and I saw his eyes looking me up and down. I felt horribly self-conscious and he jumped up from the bed and grabbed both my hands giving them a squeeze. "You know I've never seen someone look so pretty in flannel pajamas before." I immediately blurted out "you should probably have your eyes checked." He looked taken aback, and cupped my face. "I think you are beautiful Angie, and you should never let anyone make you feel anything less." I bit my lip and tried to look away, typical male response to a woman feeling bad about herself I thought.

He slid his hands into my hair and I felt his lips brush mine. I turned away, I really didn't need his pity. "I'm really tired." He gently let me go and headed into the bathroom. I slid into the far side of the bed and hugged the edge, closing my eyes and just hoping I would fall asleep.

I heard him leave the bathroom and the click of the light. I felt a dip in the bed and he slid under the covers. I was torn between wanting to turn over and snuggle up to him, and the reality that this was just pretend. I was his pretend girlfriend, so why did it matter?


	3. Chapter 3

~o~

I looked at the clock next to me with blurry eyes and saw it was 4am. I groaned and stumbled to the bathroom, hating my bladder for not letting me sleep a little longer. I slid back into bed carefully, trying to not wake Gabriel. I was staring at the ceiling when I felt his hand close over mine. I chewed my lip and entwined my fingers in his.

"Hey Angie?"

"Yeah?"

"I have something I need to tell you."

My stomach immediately went into knots. "What is it?"

I heard him take a few deep breaths. "You know how I told you that I told everyone that you're my girlfriend? Well I sort of told them you were my girlfriend almost two months ago."

I sat up and looked down at him. "Why?"

He reached up and gently touched my face. "They had been planning this ski trip for a while now, and I saw you and I thought that maybe I could just ask you to go with me. But then I just thought you'd say no. I mean we had just met and I had just started working there and I didn't want to come off as…"

I silenced him with a kiss, my fingers carding through his hair. I pulled away, and booped his nose. "How about some coffee sweetie pie?" He grinned and booped my nose. "Sure thing sugar bear."

~o~

We were at the top of the small bunny slope, and I was seriously regretting my life decisions. Gabriel looked almost terrified, and I squeezed his hand. "C'mon sweetie pie, it's just a little hill." He nodded and reassuringly I patted his back.

Michael was explaining the mechanics of it, and I volunteered to go first. I pushed off and tried to keep my eyes open and somehow made it to the bottom of the hill without incident. Bobbie Jo cheered and gave me a hug. I looked up at where Michael was nudging Gabriel. He started slowly, and made it about halfway before his skis crossed and he went face first into the snow. Bobbie Jo and I giggled, but when he didn't immediately get up I panicked and kicked off my skis, running up the hill as Michael was running down it. We got to Gabriel and he had sat up, white faced and clutching his right ankle.

"Told you I'd make an ass of myself." He hissed through clenched teeth. Michael gingerly touched his ankle and Gabriel looked like he might faint, I hugged him gently from behind. Bobbi Jo said something about getting the medic and took off running. Michael and I supported him and then carried him towards the main building, and were met halfway by a medic on a snowmobile. They got Gabe loaded and Michael and I took off running behind it towards the building. I was so afraid for him I was breathless once we got there. He was laying on a bed in a back room, and the medics told us that all 7 of us couldn't go back at once. Michael practically pushed me forward and told them I was his girlfriend so they let me go back with him.

I ran in and grabbed his hand, stroking his forehead. "Gabe, you okay?" I felt tears threaten, he looked so pale as the medics were starting to remove his boot. He squeezed my hand tightly and whimpered. I murmured reassuringly and kept stroking his forehead and hair. He looked up at me and tried to smile, it came out as more of a grimace. "Have I told you you're the best pretend girlfriend I have ever not dated?" I laughed and felt tears on my cheek. "Well sweetie pie, you are totally my favorite not boyfriend." I noticed the medic giving us an odd look while he worked. He got Gabriel's foot wrapped up and told me that we needed to take him to a regular hospital as soon as possible for x-rays. He left and Michael and everyone else flooded the room.

Michael took Gabriel's other hand and gave it a squeeze. "I hear you tried to break your ankle, we will get your stuff together while Angie takes you to the hospital." Gabe gave a small nod. "Thanks bro, sorry for being such a party pooper." Michael leaned down and gave his younger brother a hug. "I'd say take care of yourself, but I think Angie has that covered." Gabe managed a small smile and kissed the back of my hand. "Yes she does."

~o~

We sat in the hospital room, waiting for the x-ray results. The doctor had already told him he was almost positive Gabe had a small fracture in his fibula. They had already given him morphine, and he was grinning at me and waving his hand in front of his face. "No more drugs for me or I'll float away." He slurred. I giggled and kissed his temple. "Well, as soon as they release you I'm taking you home and staying there with you until you are better." He clutched at my hand. "You don't have to do that Angie, I will manage." I shook my head. "You're high on morphine and broke your leg, the last thing you need is to be left alone."

He turned his head away and stared into nothing. "I'm pretty much used to people leaving me alone at this point. I'm not exactly a loveable kind of guy." I felt my heart twinge. "Gabe," I whispered, gently turning his face back to mine. "I'm not the type of person to leave someone I care about alone." He sniffled and clumsily tried to pull me down to him. I wrapped him in a hug and pressed my face into his neck. "You know you're the first guy who told me I looked pretty in flannel pajamas." He hummed into my hair. "Ya Angie, but you'd look even prettier naked." It was a good thing he couldn't see my face. I felt the hot blush spread across it and tried not to think about his morphine induced comment.

I was saved from having to respond by the doctor coming in, along with a nurse and all the stuff they use for casts. Gabe groaned when he saw it. The doctor confirmed the break and told him to just try to relax while they positioned his foot and prepared the cast. He squeezed my hand and I saw his jaw clenching, I felt like crying for him. By the time they finished and gave us his prescription I could see how exhausted Gabe was. I headed for the nearest Walgreens drive through and grabbed it, then gently shook Gabe to ask for directions to his place. He managed to mumble out his address and I put it into my GPS and started driving.

We reached the house and I knew I must have gotten the address wrong. It was a giant three story colonial style house, all brick and a three car garage. I pulled up into the driveway and gently shook Gabe again. "I think I got the wrong address?" He opened his eyes and squinted towards the house. "It's mine" he mumbled while fumbling for his keys. I grabbed the keys and told him to wait while I unlocked the house. I left the door open and came back to the car, helping him onto his crutches and we somehow made it inside without an incident.

"Where's your bedroom?" He gave a tired sigh and looked at the giant staircase. I shook my head. "Uh-uh Gabe." I looked around and spotted a giant living room with oversized couches to my right and directed him over to them. I helped him sit as gently as I could and took off his remaining boot and jacket.

"Just tell me where your room is and I will get you everything you'll need." He yawned and rubbed his eyes. "Mmm... upstairs and upstairs and last room in the hallway." I moved the crutches and got him to lie down then headed upstairs.

I went up the first then second flight of stairs, and passed two giant bedrooms as I made my way down the hallway. I got to the last door and swung it open and thought there was no way this small bedroom was his. I turned on the light and stepped in, noticing the unmade bed and one of his dress shirts tossed across a chair. I pulled his pillows off and a couple blankets, then looked in his dresser for pajamas. I found some flannel ones and couldn't resist grabbing them. I went in to the small bathroom and grabbed his toothbrush and toothpaste.

I balanced everything the best I could and made my way back downstairs. He was already asleep. I admittedly felt a little weird undressing him, but I figured it would be less painful and embarrassing for both of us this way. Thankfully the snow gear was loose enough and the doctors had already cut away some of them that getting it off was easy. I hesitated when I went to undo his jeans, dear lord was I actually about to pull his pants off? I felt my face go from a light flush to full red when I heard him laugh tiredly.

"Go ahead, I promise it doesn't bite." I looked up in his amused and morphine laden face. "Oh my god, I was just… I have your pajama pants…" he smiled and nodded. "Just keep telling yourself that." I huffed and unbuttoned and unzipped his jeans. "Nothing I haven't seen be…" I had just gotten his pants around his thighs when I totally checked him out and had to rescind my statement. He winked. "You were saying something my little sugar bear?"

I got his pants off and started pulling up his pajama bottoms. "I was just wondering how many women you've killed with that thing and where you hid the bodies." He laughed and pressed his hands to his face. "Mmm, have honestly never heard that one before." I smirked and caught his hands. "You think you can sit up so I can get your shirt off?" He snickered and sat up. "Now that I have definitely heard before."

I sighed and made a point of rolling my eyes at him as I helped him out of his shirt and into the flannel top. I grabbed his pillows and put them under his head, and gently laid his blankets on him. "Do you want a pain pill before you sleep?" He nodded and pointed. "Kitchen's that way, and thank you again Angie." I kissed the top of his head. "It's no problem Gabe."

The kitchen was massive, and I tried to not wonder why a single guy would buy a house like this. It was definitely made for a big family. I filled a glass of water and told myself it was none of my business why he owned the house. I gave him a pill and the water then recovered him with the blankets. I leaned down and gave him a gentle kiss. "Sweet dreams Gabriel." He sighed contentedly and I watched him until he fell asleep.

I took off everything but my t-shirt and panties and climbed onto the other couch, curling up in blankets and a pillow that smelled almost as good as he did. I tried to stay awake in case he needed something, but exhaustion overcame me and I fell into a dreamless sleep.


	4. Chapter 4

~o~

I heard swearing, something crashing to the floor and fell off the couch in a panic. Gabe looked sheepishly at me, one crutch under his arm and the other on the floor. I sleepily grabbed it and helped him with it. "Shoulda woke me." I grumbled. "What are you trying to do anyway?" He just stared at me, and cleared his throat. His face looked seriously flushed. I reached over and pressed my hand to his forehead. "Gabe are you okay? Your face is all flushed. Can I get you something?"

He took a deep breath and closed his eyes. "Pants." What? I looked down and he still had his pants on... and oh fuck. "Oh my, shit I'm sorry…" I grabbed for my pants and quickly pulled them on, feeling beyond embarrassed. I turned around and he quickly looked away. "Gabe, were you just checking out my ass?" He sucked his bottom lip. "Yes and I really need to use the bathroom. Wait that sounded wrong." He tried to maneuver forward and I followed behind him, making sure he didn't fall.

I could see the pain on his face by the time we reached the bathroom. I opened the door and started to follow him in. "Angie, you don't have to… uhm you know." I sighed. "You're in serious pain and you falling in the bathroom is not okay, Michael would never forgive me. Let me just… how about I hold you from behind so you can balance without the crutches?" He looked almost mortified, but nodded and I came in behind him and wrapped my arms around his chest. He sat the crutches aside and leaned against me. "I can't believe I'm doing this with you. Seriously Angie, this is not how I pictured our weekend together."

I snickered, and pressed my face into his back. "You mean with your pants around your ankles and me coming in from behind." He groaned. "It's really hard to concentrate with you talking. Especially all things considered." I mumbled sorry and just kept my face in his back, being as quiet as I could. He finally managed to pee, and get his pants back into place. He grabbed his crutches and we headed back to the living room where he sank wearily onto the sofa.

I handed him a pill and the water. "You need to eat. I'll make you something, okay?" He nodded and took the pill, leaning back onto the couch with a grimace. I went to the kitchen and opened the fridge. It looked like someone had unloaded the takeout truck into it. I looked for something that wasn't in a Chinese to go box, but it was pretty much empty. I rifled the cabinets and they were almost empty. I felt really bad for him suddenly, alone in this house.

I quickly went back to the living room, where he was barely awake. "Gabe, I'm going to the store, I'll be back in twenty minutes. Please promise me you'll stay right here?" He grumbled and nodded.

I made it to the store and back in record time, checked and he was asleep still. I unloaded the groceries and started making breakfast burritos. I hoped he liked bacon, but then again who doesn't? I made him two and poured a glass of milk. I gently woke him. "Gabe, you need to eat sweetie." He sat up and I helped him prop his leg up on the coffee table before placing the plate on his lap. "I hope you like breakfast burritos? And I got you some milk, let me know if you need a drink."

He didn't say anything but devoured the food, and the milk. "Would you like more? I made plenty." He nodded and handed me his plate. I noticed he hadn't looked at me since I had brought the food out, and now he was just staring at his hands in his lap. I went back to the kitchen and made two more burritos and noticed the coffee was ready, so I balanced the coffee along with the milk and the plate.

I sat the plate on his lap and put down the coffee and milk. "I'm going to grab my coffee, I'll be right back." He nodded and dug into his food, wordless. When I got to the kitchen I took a few deep breaths. I thought about what he had said in the hospital, about being unlovable. I shook my head at the thought and poured my coffee.

He was almost finished with his second burrito when I got back. I took his plate and set it on the coffee table. "Coffee or milk?" he worried his bottom lip then slowly met my eyes. "Why are you helping me Angie?" I reached over and took his hand. "Because I care. You shouldn't be alone right now Gabe." He looked down where I had my hands over his. I could see the emotion playing on his face, he looked almost defeated, and it was a look I recognized all too well. "I'd like some coffee please." His voice sounded small, and I wanted nothing more than to hold him and tell him that it was all okay, but I also knew from personal experience that sometimes that wasn't enough.

I handed him the coffee and slowly sipped mine. And I waited, because people who are the best listeners are those who are used to never having someone listening to them. He sipped his coffee and stared down at it, and I waited still. As if on cue he took a deep breath and let it out slowly.

"I guess you're wondering why I am in this giant house alone. And why I am using that small room all the way upstairs. I suppose you are wondering a lot of things." And I was, but I said nothing, just gave a small nod. He raked his hand through his hair and stared out at nothing.

A few minutes passed before he spoke again. "I moved here four months ago. I had gotten that job offer and told him I needed time to get settled so I figured two months was enough for…" he sighed. "I thought it was a good idea to take this job and move and now I wonder if I made a mistake. I just thought I was doing the right thing." I took his now empty coffee cup and placed it beside mine on the table. I bit my tongue to keep from talking, human nature and all that but I knew he had a lot more to say.

He leaned back against the couch and stared at the ceiling. "I was engaged. I wanted her to come with me and she said she would. But then as it got closer to moving she started pulling away from me, saying how I was forcing her to choose between her family and me. But I'd already closed on the house, quit my job and accepted another one. I begged her to come with me, to just try and make it work…" he closed his eyes and swallowed hard. I could see the tears spiking his lashes when he reopened them. "I just don't know what it was that I did so wrong…"

I couldn't stop myself from wrapping my arms around him, he pressed his face into my neck and I stroked his hair. He hesitated for a moment before wrapping his arms around me and pulling me onto his lap. "Your leg" "Screw my leg" we sat for a long time wrapped up in each others arms before he started talking again.

"When I first saw you at that reception desk I couldn't get over how green your eyes were, and how no matter what kind of crap was thrown your way you still managed to smile at everyone. You were kind of like a shining light and don't laugh I know how corny that sounds, but I just wanted to be around someone like that. Someone who cared more and put others before herself." His fingers were tracing small patterns on my back and his face was still in my neck. Another deep breath from him and I knew it was my turn to talk.

"When you first asked me out, I only said yes because I panicked." He looked up at me and I could almost see him biting his tongue. "I panicked because you are good looking, smart, successful, but mostly because you are one of the few people at work who actually looked me in the eye. You made me feel good about myself, and that's a daily struggle for me." I absentmindedly played with the top button of his pajama top. "When you called me about that ski trip I thought you were calling to cancel because you realized you'd made a mistake and didn't actually want to be seen with the chubby secretary from your work."

"Angie you are so fucking attractive I can't stand it. Don't judge me but the first day I saw you all I could think about was throwing you across that desk and making you scream my name. And then there you were, standing in my living room in your panties and that tiny t-shirt and why do think it took me so long to piss?"

"Because you were planning on where to bury my body?" He leaned in to where our lips were almost touching. "I already knew." I let my lips brush his as I spoke. "And where is that exactly?" He kissed me and sucked my bottom lip. "In my bed."


	5. Chapter 5

It was a little after dinner and Gabe had just fallen asleep again when I heard the door open softly. I stood up and saw Michael holding our bags. He came over and quietly sat them down. He looked at Gabriel then back at me. "He okay?" I nodded. "He's in pain, but the meds are helping. I made sure he ate something besides Chinese take-out today, I think it may have sent his system into shock."

Michael laughed quietly and put his hand on my shoulder. "Angie, I'm not sure what all Gabriel's told you, but I just want you to know it's been a long time since I've seen him this happy. Even before he moved…"

"He told me. Not a lot of detail but enough that I totally get it. I have been where he is at, and I know how much it hurts."

"Thank you. For being here for him. For everything. I love my little brother more than you can imagine and when that bitch broke his heart…"

I saw a dark look pass over his features. Something told me that the last thing I would ever want to do was piss him off. "Michael, I have never met someone like Gabriel before. He is generous, selfless, he brightens the world around him. I would help you bury her body if you asked. Gabe and I have only known each other for a couple months, but I'd do anything for him."

He smiled, his blue eyes impossibly bright. "I know you would. Maybe you'll be the one to help him make this house a home." I swallowed hard. "I just… sometimes I wonder what he even sees in me. He's like a 10 and I'm a 6."

"11." We both turned and Gabe gave us a drugged out smile. "Seriously Michael, you should see her ass in these panties she was wearing this morning." He closed his eyes again. "So fucking hot…"

I felt a hot blush spread across my face and I'm sure my mouth was open. I turned to Michael who shrugged and laughed. "It's how I feel about Stephanie's ass, and she thinks I'm crazy also, so don't let it get to you." I giggled. "Thanks again Michael, I could so use a shower right about now."

"So could I!" Gabe slurred, waving his hand towards me. "We can save water…" I stifled a laugh. "Maybe you should lay off the drugs sweetie pie?" He hummed and laughed. "Maybe I should lay on you…"

Michael chuckled. "I think I will get out of here before he tries something besides talking. Thanks again Angie." He gave me a brief hug and as he walked out the door I wondered what it would be like to have someone like him as a brother.

~o~

I looked over at Gabe. I just knew if I got in the shower alone he'd end up following. But I just wasn't sure if I was ready to actually 'bury the body' with the guy.

I sighed and walked over to him, kneeling down and stroking his hair. "Hey Gabe." He grumbled and looked at me. "I need to take a shower." His eyes opened and he smirked. "Me too babe, but I need some help." I groaned. "I know you do, but get a bit more sleep, I'm not strong enough to carry you. Once you are more coherent I promise I'll help. But only if you stay on the couch while I shower." He grumbled some more but finally agreed.

I wanted to just stay under the hot water forever, but I had a feeling if I took too long I would have company. I headed back out to the living room and saw Gabe pretending like he was stretching and not reaching for his crutches. "Really?" He gave me a wide eyed look. "I was just stretching. But since your back maybe I can have a turn?"

Again I was asking myself was I really about to do this. I helped him up and onto his crutches, and then grabbed him some clean clothes and boxers out of his bag. I followed along behind and enjoyed the view. Once in the bathroom, I told him to sit and stared at his cast for a moment. "I'm thinking you'd do better in a bath than a shower at this point. And you should get in before I start the water so we can avoid you getting your cast wet." He looked a bit nervous suddenly. "Maybe I should do this alone?" I wanted to agree with him, but him getting into and out of the tub with one leg made me concerned. "How about I just get you into the tub, then you yell when you are done?"

He sighed. "Crap, Angie, I don't care about you seeing me naked. It's my reaction to you being so close to me while I am naked that concerns me." I blinked for a minute. "I didn't even think about that. Uhm, we are both adults here Gabe. Let me just help you and worry about the rest if it happens."

"I think you mean when, but you're right."

I helped him out of his shirt and pajama pants with him leaning on his crutches. I gingerly reached for the waistband of his boxers and so help me I was trying to not notice he was already starting to pitch a tent in them. "Angie, so help me can you please not lick your lips like that when you are about to take off my boxers." I hadn't even realized I was doing it, so I bit my lip as I grabbed the waistband. I noticed he was looking at the ceiling, probably trying to decide on a paint color and not the fact that I was now kneeling in front of him. "Gabe?" He looked down at me and the look on his face was priceless. He looked half terrified and was now completely turned on. "Yes?" he gasped. "Uhm, can you step out of these?" I asked as I tugged his boxers.

This was either the worst or possibly the best idea I had ever come up with in my life. I was kneeling in front of an insanely hot guy with a massive erection that was completely my fault, and I was asking him to relinquish his boxers. He stepped out of them and avoided looking me in the eye. We somehow got him into the tub and I started the water. I wrapped his right leg carefully in a towel and handed him bath stuff.

"You want me to wait outside?" He shrugged and started shampooing his hair. I sat on the toilet and stared intently at my nails. I tried telling my brain it was so not interested in what was happening in the tub, but my body told me I was lying.

But my self-doubt trumped everything and reminded me that he couldn't really be interested in someone like me. He was obviously still hurting from his last relationship, and having an overly helpful female hand was the only reason his body reacted the way it did.

~o~

Gabe was back on the couch, I had given him another pill and he was finally dozing off. I watched him as his face softened in his sleep. He looked beautiful and so peaceful. He deserves someone better than me I thought. He has so much to give, and I didn't want to get in the way of him being truly happy.

I regretted helping him, and letting myself become attached to someone that I knew in the end I could never have. I mentally kicked myself for ever saying yes. Even if he did stick around for a while, someone else would come along and he would realize that being with me was a mistake.

I made the decision that I was not going to let it come to that. I would just tell him in the morning that after he was healed he would be free of me. After all, I told myself, I would do anything for him and he would be better off without someone like me around.


	6. Chapter 6

I finished making breakfast and headed into the living room, mentally preparing myself to do the right thing. He smiled so brightly it made my heart hurt as I handed him his plate. He dug in to the bacon and eggs and I went back to the kitchen to get coffee. I stood and watched the pot, reminding myself that Gabriel would be better off with someone else. I took a few deep breaths and carried our coffee back to the living room.

"How's your leg feeling?" He finished chewing and winked. "Better, but I blame it on my beautiful nurse taking such good care of me." I blushed. I looked into his golden eyes and felt my resolve waiver. I needed to be strong I thought.

"Angie? What's wrong?" I swallowed hard and felt tears threaten. "Everything," I sniffled. "Gabe, I can't do this, I'm not good enough for you, and I think you'd be better off…" I looked up when I heard the plate crash to the ground and I was being roughly hauled onto his lap. "You listen to me dammit!" I gasped as he wrapped me in a vise-like grip. "The only thing you are is too good for me! You are beautiful, smart and there is no way in hell I am letting you go that easy!" He pulled me into his chest, I could feel his ragged breathing against my hair. "Angie, don't you dare ever think I don't care about you." His voice was barely a whisper. "I've wanted you since I first saw you, I told you that. Just… please… please give me a chance to prove myself to you."

My tears started spilling onto his chest. "I just don't know." I cried, clinging to him. "Gabe, I want this to work so badly, but I'm so used to things always falling apart, I don't feel beautiful or smart, most days I just feel like I'm worthless." He cupped my tear streaked face and gently kissed me. "You think I don't? Baby, everyone goes through this, and as long as we have each other I just know things will work out. Just don't give up on everything we could have together, okay?" I sniffled and nodded. "Okay."

His mouth devoured mine, hungry and claiming. I kissed back with the same intensity, fighting back the doubt and fear and just enjoying the feel of him embracing me. Breathless we parted, sitting with our foreheads pressed together.

After a few moments I couldn't help but giggle as I looked at the broken plate. "You know Gabe, if breakfast was so bad you could have just told me so." He choked out a laugh. "I am regretting not finishing it first. I don't suppose you made more?" I poked his belly. "Are you sure you should be eating so much?" He looked deep into my eyes and licked his lips. "I could of something else I could eat, for hours and hours."

I whimpered then jumped up quickly, retrieving the pieces of the plate. "I'll get you more breakfast," I looked back into his eyes. "I think it might be less complicated for both of us." He looked almost despairing, so I leaned down and gave him a soft kiss. "For now." I could feel him brightening up as I walked into the kitchen.

~o~

He had called in and talked to our boss, about the time off we were both going to take, and I had made a run to my place to gather more of my things. It was unspoken, but it seemed that we both agreed I was going to be moving in with him. I was nervous and still unsure if what I was doing was right. I also knew he was feeling the same, but he was stubborn and insisted that I stay and we try and make whatever it was between us work. He was getting his cast off in a week, and that only added to my uncertainty, I still just didn't know if I was prepared to cross the line and 'bury the body' yet.

~o~

"Gabe are you sure?" I chewed my lip nervously. He nodded. "It makes more sense, the biggest master is on the second floor, and my cast is almost off. Angie, I won't rush you into anything you are not ready for, I'd really just like to sleep beside you." He leaned over and gave me a chaste kiss. I nuzzled his neck, breathing him in. "Gabe, I think I'd like sleeping beside you too."

He sighed happily and kissed my temple. "Maybe you'd like to move your stuff into there now? I'll be fine down here for a while." I winked. "Already so bossy?" He smirked and shrugged.

I started moving my stuff, hanging clothes and putting away things in the bathroom. As I set my toothbrush in the holder, it hit me, I was really doing this. I was moving in with Gabriel, a smart, successful and sexy guy, and he really liked me. And of course I immediately began to feel a panic attack coming. Before I would have just stood there and tried to manage, but I practically ran down the stairs and threw my arms around Gabe, trying my best to breathe.

He saw my face and hauled me onto his lap, stroking my back and hair. "It's okay," he murmured, "Shhh, I've got you baby. Just take deep breaths, that's my girl." I gasped and finally got my breathing under control. "Kiss me." He gave me startled look. "Please Gabriel just…" He devoured my mouth with his, hands roaming my back and squeezing my bottom as we kissed. I slid my hands across his chest wrapped my arms around him unable to resist the urge to grind my pelvis down against his.

"Fuck" he hissed. "Angie, please don't do that again unless you want me to tear off your pants, I barely have any self-control as it is." I looked into his eyes and could see the lust burning in them. I slid off his lap and started sliding down his sweat pants. Just because I wasn't ready for sex didn't mean I wasn't ready to pleasure him. "Angie," he whimpered. "You don't have to…" "Shhh…" I whispered, working his boxers down.

His hands knotted into my hair as I slid my tongue along the length of him, a low groan emanating from his lips. I took him into my mouth and reveled in the masculine taste of him. I eagerly sucked and hollowed out my cheeks as I worked the full length of him, he hissed and tried not to buck his hips into me. "Angie, oh fuck baby, so close…" I stroked and sucked harder, wanting to taste every bit of him. His hips stuttered, hot come rushing down my throat as I swallowed eagerly. His head lolled back as he gasped for air.

I gently pulled up his boxers and sweat pants, then slid up on the couch next to him and laid my head onto his chest. He groaned and wrapped his arms around me kissing the top of my head. "You think I will ever let you leave after something like that you are sorely mistaken. Holy crap that was amazing." I giggled and gave him a squeeze before looking up at him and winking. "And that was just my mouth."


End file.
